Lolita pp. 3-62

Wow, what can i say about this novel? Very interesting to me that someone actually published something with this sort of subject matter. It is kind of freaky the way that this novel is written, it is very descriptive and scary in that way. I guess it is well written but its hard to take it all in just because of what the author is addressing. I think that the author, Vladimir Nabokov, has the same feelings that Humbert Humbert has in the novel. I feel like this is true just because of the things that the author writes, the descriptiveness of the feelings and such. like its his real feelings just hidden behind the character.
The beginning of the novel starts out with him talking about his first "girl-child" love...who is Annabel. As well as calling himself a murderer, "You can always count on a murderer for a fancy prose style" i wonder what is meant by this, did he actually murder someone before or is this foreshadowing something to come. He also comes close to murdering someone when the Valeria ordeal occurs. Her leaving him for someone else with whom she loves. When they are at their place of residence he considers slapping her and even performing murder. "Humbert the Terrible deliberated with Humbert the Small whether Humbert Humbert should kill her or her lover, or both, or neither." This talking to yourself in such a manner is grounds for insanity, i mean everyone talks to themselves every now and then questioning actions and consequences, but when it comes to murder, and "toying with the idea of enjoying his little sister." then you got yourself a problem. I fear for what is to happen in this novel, will he actually acquire what he is after? It seems that Lolita almost has the same feelings for him, although she is only twelve years old and probably lacking sexual knowledge she seems to be pretty aggressive i guess you could say. "She twisted herself free, recoiled, and lay back in the right-hand corner of the davenport. Then, with perfect simplicity, the impudent child extended her legs across my lap." it seems like Lo is just being a child her and just playing around, but i also get the feeling as I read that she almost knows whats going on and is going along with it. What is weird about this situation is that Humbert knows that what he is doing is wrong, but he still goes through with it, like it is an addiction. Here he states "By this time I was in a state of excitement bordering on insanity; but I also had the cunning of the insane." he knows that its kind of insane the goals that he has with this kid, but he's using that insanity to get what he wants. And later after their first "encounter" he says that he "i felt proud of myself. I had stolen the honey of a spasm without impairing the morals of a minor." This i guess might be something to be happy about, he got what he wanted and didn't really corrupt Lo, but he also states that he has no intention of stopping what he is doing. After their "encounter" they go to lunch with Mrs. Haze whom i think wants something with Humbert. She never really talks well about Lo when its just Humbert and older Haze, it almost seems like her and her daughter are fighting for the man, its just Humbert is really weird and goes for a twelve year old.

Howl

Howl was probably the craziest poem that i have read in a long time. I really could not pinpoint what all this meant. The first section could possibly be things in the world that have made smart people become corrupt. The very first statement says "I've seen the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness" and the rest continues with statements about people who do and think things that may show a corrupt world.
"Moloch! Solitude! Filth! Ugliness!" moloch is continued throughout this next section of the poem. I looked up online on what it could possibly mean. What i found was that it is a hebrew term for someone like a king, or a term for a kind of sacrifice. Since it is constantly repeated throughout this section, it may be expressing the different kinds of sacrifices in his world.
When the part about Carl Solomon comes up i begin to wonder of the sexuality of Allen Ginsberg. He keeps stating that he is in Rockland with Solomon. Rockland may be a place where they met or a favorite place near San Francisco. The main part that makes me think that Carl Solomon may be his lover is the section that says: "I'm with you in Rockland, where we hug and kiss the United States under our bedsheets" however, this could just be talking about trying to help the country, but it still "coughs all night and won't let us sleep." I think the main message in this poem could be about how corrupt the world and this country is and can be. I didn't look up who Carl Solomon but he seems like he could be important, maybe a bad model of the world.

Engl 215, Sonny's Blues

Sonny's Blues was a very good story. One could believe that it is a nonfiction piece. It is fiction, but it depicts very real and truthfully subjects in life. Racism became very prevelent in the story once Sonny's brother thinks back on a conversation with his mom after his father passed away. The two boys never knew even knew that they once had an uncle, he got killed a long time ago from a "car full of white men." I hadn't exactly depicted the race of Sonny and his brother until this time, it also helped to have a depiction of the year.

A part that was very interesting to me was when the brother was departing on the subway and after their talk Sonny's friend asked if he could borrow a dollar. After reaching in his wallet to give him a dollar he realized that he only had a five dollar bill. He gave the five to Sonny's friend "he didn't look at it-- he didn't want to look at it. A terrible closed look came over his face, as though he was keeping the number on the bill a secret from him and me. Thanks, he said, and was now dying to see me go." I think this part just show the strength of addiction. I think in part when sonny's friend saw that it was a five, he was excited and at the same time sad because he knew that he would just buy even more heroin with it. And as soon as he got it he was ready for Sonny's brother to go because he wanted to go get his fix.

The ending of the story was very powerful. Sonny really expressed his feelings through the music. It was what got him through his life. He had friends around him to support, especially Creole. Being the reader, even though you cannot physically hear the music that Sonny is playing, it seems to be playing in your head while reading this part. It's like you can just hear the emotions coming from Sonny. When Sonny's brother ordered drinks to all the musicians on the stage, I think it finally showed the connection between the two brothers that had been waiting for their whole lives. "he sipped from it and looked toward me, and nodded."

Engl 215, The Glass Menagerie, 66-97

Overall, i think it was a decent play. Most everything up until the seventh scene is all basically giving the background to each cast member's personality, character, and problems. As well as preparing for the gentleman caller, who is Jim O'Connor. The reader already knows that the daughter Laura had a big crush on Jim throughout high school, however when Jim enters the Wingfield's apartment in the 6th scene he does not seem to remember her.

When Amanda and Tom are in the kitchen doing the dishes, i was not expecting for Jim and Laura to connect so quickly. Even though Laura is extremely shy, after a few words were exchanged she opened up pretty quickly. As Jim began talking a lot i sort of started to get irritated with him. He said a lot of egotistical things i though such as "you remember that wonderful write-up i had in The Torch?" i dont know, things that he said such as that irritated me. He seemed to talk to Laura a lot about fixing her personality such as "You know what i judge to be the trouble with you? Inferiority Complex!" which he explains to be a name for people who low-rate themselves. If many people were talked to like this they could get angry, but all Jim is trying to do is help her and i agree with what he is doing. It is obvious through the play that she seriously lacks confidence. After what seems to only be a few minutes, Jim basically opens up to her saying that he has strong feelings for her, and how she is different than most people and that is what he loves about her. He asks her if anyone has ever called her pretty and says " Well, you are! In a very different way from anyone else. And all the nicer because of the difference, too." At first you could take this the wrong way, like, im a different kind of pretty? but i think jim does a good job at making it clear that its a good difference, he makes this point several times.

I thought something serious was going to become of this evening between them too, but shortly after he plants a kiss, he basically tells her that nothing will happen from this because he admits to having a fiance. I felt bad when i read this, not only for just Laura but for Amanda as well as Tom. Amanda wanted something good to happen for Laura and Tom did as well, so that he can move on with his life. Amanda gets angry as soon as Jim leaves after hearing about his fiance, Laura seems to not show much emotion, she seems to just be kind of there. I felt bad for Tom because he was catching heat for not letting them know that Jim was already taken, when Tom had no idea. It seems kind of crazy that Laura got Jim to like her even though he didn't even go to the dinner to be a gentleman caller, he was unaware of a sister being there but the "secret mission" was still almost accomplished. I should have read the couple pages in the front of the book before starting the play, because throughout the reading i was going through different disabilities that Laura could have. I don't remember a part when they actually stated what it was exactly, so i was just guessing that it was polio or something of that nature. After finished I looked at the front on the page about the characters and under Laura it says "A childhood illness has left her crippled, one leg slightly shorter than the other, and held in a brace." At the end when Tom says that he left St. Louis, i didn't really think it was that selfish. Yes he left his sister and his mother to deal with the things on their own, but he still had a life to live but was held back by them. He followed in his father's footsteps like he said.

In Dreams Begin Responsibilities

I think this short story was about the narrators problems with his parents. I think that it is obvious that the relationship between his mother and his father was uneasy. I didn't really realize this until the end of the story, when i was reading through it i didn't take note that at the beginning of the story he says: I feel as if i were in a moving picture theater" which was him basically saying i wasn't really in a movie theater but it felt like it. So as i went on reading i thought that he was actually in a movie theater watching a movie of his parents beginnings. This was sort of boggling my mind and i knew something was weird how he kept referring to the actor and actress as his parents. At the end of the story he wakes up from his sleep, which tells the reader that it was a dream.

When the narrator keeps yelling at the "screen" in his dream, you know that there is something that isn't right, however everything in the "movie" seems to be going fine. I think that the photograph part was foreshadowing their marriage. It starts out great, during the beginning of the shots, but then quickly gets bad. The photographer keeps dragging on the photo shoot, wanting a better picture each time. This is like how their marriage will be, its great in the beginning, everyone is happy and in love, but very quickly gets sour and bad. Same goes for the fortune-teller part. I think that shows the anger that will quickly appear between them. The mother wants to go in and get her fortune and the father doesn't want to be in there, so they begin to fight. All the while the son who is "watching the movie in the theater" is yelling at it, telling them not to get married it will only get bad, basically.

I think it was well written and has a good topic. When the father proposed to the mother, the son was going crazy yelling trying to get them to not go through with it, that it will only lead to bad things. Such as scandals, hatred, and two kids one of which is him, who have crazy personalities or characters.

Frost Poems ENGL 215

I enjoyed Robert Frost's poem Birches. He uses a whole lot of detail when describing certain objects such as the tree. He describes what the tree looks like in so many different ways that you can get a pretty vivid picture in your mind. He basically describes the tree with the birches as it changes throughout the year and through all of the seasons. When he begins to talk about the leaves falling off onto the ground as if a girl on her hands and knees throws her hair before her to let it dry in the sun, i get a little confused. He uses such a great amount of detail i begin to lose focus on what he's really trying to get at. After all this detail he begins to go back to the boy who swings on the birches. The was the part of the poem that i began to understand mostly. He begins to talk about how he wishes he were young again and could go swing on birches like the boy can. Being his age there is not much more for him to look forward to, life is like a "pathless wood" with "cobwebs," when your still young life is more exciting and fun. Getting away from that life and trying it over again.
Mending wall was very interesting to me. Walls can do both good and bad for situations. If you build a wall it is like your blocking yourself from relationships. It divides two things, like him and his neighbor. His neighbor is all pine trees and on Frost's side of the wall is an apple orchard, with the wall in place, the apples from frost will never get to his neighbors side. Like a blocked friendship. All his neighbor says about the wall is that "Good fences make good neighbors" this reminds me of the television show Home Improvement, there was a large fence or wall dividing Tim's yard and his neighbors, yet his neighbor and him were great friends. I guess what the neighbor in frost's poem is saying that walls can enable better friendships? a place to meet and discuss maybe? or having the wall there creates a perfect amount of seeing someone but not too much to where you begin to dislike the individual. This is a very interesting poem to me, i feel like i don't understand it at all, but at the same time I do it is just hard to express the meaning of it.

Poems ENGL 215

I enjoyed Carver's Photograph of My Father in His Twenty Second year. I believe what he is expressing is that his father was never really a great father to him. He was an alcoholic and was never there to show him manly things such as fishing. He loves him, but he can't say that hes thankful for who his father was and what his father made Carver to become. Ezra Pound's poem was a lot shorter than expected. Maybe it's about how the atmosphere in a metro station is kind of dull and sad.

Letter of Introduction

I did a decent amount of reading throughout my high school career. I read works such as The Odyssey, Romeo & Juliet, The Crucible, October Sky, Beowulf, and others. I read many poems as well but cannot choose any certain ones. I enjoyed most of them , however i was kind of dissappointed in Beowulf, it wasn't as good as i had hoped. The Odyssey was another epic poem that i enjoyed a good bit.

In the four years that i was in high school i had two awesome english teachers and two terrible english teachers. The two that i disliked were very strict and lacked personality. A particular one was Ms. Casey and she used to always tell us that she didn't ever watch television, however it was hard to believe because she loved denzel washington and had a movie poster for a Knights Tale on her wall. I wrote many research papers for novels and short stories as well as argumentative essays. I have never really written anything that i didn't have to write for school. maybe a few rhymes here and there while hanging out with friends, but other than that no.

I have a facebook and get on it once or twice a day, sometimes more depending on if i have nothing to do. I regularly talk to friends through the IM program on facebook. I see this writing more as non-fiction because it is describing things i've done and what i do.